A wise rapper once said: “Summer, summer, summer time. Let’s just sit back and unwind.” Okay, so maybe he didn’t say it, but his backup singers did, and you need to chill out on the technicalities! Anyhow, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, summer is upon us and for many that means sitting back, soaking up those sunny rays, whether it be on a beach, in a park, or on a patio somewhere sipping delicious sangria. By the time July rolls around, your golden skin looks even goldener while wearing anything white, your smile lights up any room your in, and your confidence radiates from your perfectly tanned skin.

I hate you.

I’m with the late great comedian Bill Hicks on this one:

“Maybe I’m just jealous, everyone at the beach is perfect. You know, tanned skin and white teeth. I have white skin, tanned teeth. Not my environment. You put me under a neon beer light I look pretty cool. But I’m so pale when I take my shirt off at the beach I’m like a prism. People are like ‘Bill put your shirt back on, we can’t find our towels!’ All these moths are bumping into me.”

Okay, maybe hate is a strong word, but I am one of many who don’t so much tan as I burst into flames. Very frustrating. My skin is so sensitive I get sunburned watching the weather channel. So how does one enjoy the boost in self confidence that a tanned complexion provides, when everything you read and watch tells you “Sun: bad. Tanning beds: bad. UV rays: bad. Skin cancer: really bad”?

The answer: sunless tanning. I’ve always felt weird about spray-on tans, I’ve even teased friends sporting their “tans in a can.” But much in the same way as I used to make endless jokes about Coors Lite and now find myself drinking it, natural looking tans due to advancements in sunless tanning technology and higher quality products are starting to change my mind.

Spray Tanning

Considered by dermatologists to be the safest and most effective sunless tanning tool, spray tanning is becoming increasingly popular. Spray booths will give you a uniformly brown tan, without the streaks, blotches, or orange complexions associated with many sunless tanning products. And the best part, no UV rays!

Once inside the booth, a mist containing dihydroxyacetone (DHA) will evenly coat you from head to toe. DHA is an FDA approved substance used in many tanning sprays and liquids, which reacts with the top layer of your skin, dyeing it golden brown.

Tips

You must try to resist the temptation to re-enact the water scene from “Flashdance” immediately after your spray down. In order for the DHA to fully work its magic you should refrain from showering or sweating within four to six hours.

Although the mist is harmless to your external organ, as well as to internal organs such as your liver, you should protect your eyes and should refrain from tasting or inhaling the product.

To ensure a week-long, healthy looking tan you need to keep the dyed skin on your body for as long as possible. So no rubbing your head on a sharp rock to create a rip in the outer layer, allowing you to slither and shed your way out of your new tan. And if you’re a human being reading this, make sure to exfoliate all the dead skin cells before visiting the tanning salon. As was mentioned, the top layer of skin is the one changing color so it should be as young as possible. Also remember to moisturize your skin daily afterwards.

During your first visit to the tanning salon, don’t be shy to ask about the booths, the beds and the products. What type of lights do they use? Are the lotions FDA approved? The last you want is to end up like this girl.

Sunless Self Tanning

The improper use of sunless tanning sprays or lotions can leave your skin looking like it was attacked by amateur graffiti artists sporting nothing but cans of orange. Blotches and streaks are often the result of skin that hasn’t been properly prepared beforehand, the uneven application of the product, or simply a crappy product to begin with. There is no excuse for purchasing said crap anymore, as sunless tanning products have greatly increased in quality, and come in a variety of skin tones and colors.

Tips

Shave, exfoliate, and moisturize your skin at least two days before applying your spray or lotion. Areas like ankles, knees, elbows, and knuckles require special attention as sunless tanning products are attracted to dead or dry skin cells. So if your knuckles aren’t properly exfoliated, guess who’s going to be wearing orange rings?

Make sure to apply slowly and evenly, rubbing the product into your skin completely to avoid tiger stripes or leopard prints. If streaking occurs, try to even out the area with sunless tanning wipes. Or in the worst case scenario, if the streaks are too dark to fix you can wipe the entire area with a cotton ball soaked in hydrogen peroxide, and start from scratch.

Test a small hidden area of your skin first to make sure the color works for you. If you’re fair skinned start with a product containing a low DHA level.

Two words you will hear often when it comes to developing the perfect tan: gradual and maintenance. Once you’ve applied a small dose of lotion or spray, it helps to re-apply equally small doses once every couple of days. If you go for it all in one shot, dunking yourself in a vat of tanning lotion, you’re going to look like Kramer when he fell asleep in the tanning bed, unnatural and ridiculous. Be patient.

As for maintenance, it’s always recommended to moisturize your skin on a regular basis, but it’s doubly important if you want your tan to last. Your external layer of skin is the one earning the color, and it is also the one which will dry up and fall off first, so be good to it, the more you moisturize, the longer the lifespan of your tan. You can also feel safe in knowing that you are not exposing your skin to the damaging, aging, wrinkling, leather face making effects of the sun!