Lawyers may not be the most beloved characters around, but they certainly have to put up with their fair share of crap, seeing how people can sue for just about every reason under the sun, moon and stars. Here are some of the most bizarre and ridiculous cases brought up in a court of law that would easily make any lawyer want to cringe.

1. A Romanian prisoner, serving 20 years in jail for murder, sued God arguing that his baptism was an agreement between him and God- to protect him and keep him out of trouble.

Source: London Times Online

2. A Chinese couple were refused legal permission to name their son “@” after the keyboard character; not based on the complete absurdity of the name, nor the fact the kid would be made fun of the rest of his life, but because on a legal basis, all names must be capable of being translated into Mandarin.

Source: London Times Online

3. A man who had recently been left by his wife, was advised to “go out and meet people and do interesting things” by a counselor. His idea of having fun was to check himself into a Galway city centre hotel where he was found dressed in latex and handcuffs, accompanied by a donkey. He was charged with cruelty to animals, lewd and obscene behavior and being a danger to himself. He was fined €2,000 for violation of the Unlawful Accommodation of Donkeys Act 1837. His solicitor, Sharon Fitzhenry said that he also suffered a fixation with the “Shrek” movies and his co-workers would often hear him talking to himself saying “Isn’t that right, Donkey?”

Source: The Register

4. Gerald Mayo attempted to sue Satan for violation of his civil rights under various United States statutes claiming: “Satan has on numerous occasions caused plaintiff misery and unwarranted threats, against the will of plaintiff, that Satan has placed deliberate obstacles in his path and has caused plaintiff’s downfall ” and had therefore “deprived him of his constitutional rights”. You and me alike buddy… Sorry, but no dice.

Source: Indian Lawyer

5. Nebraska State Senator Ernie Chambers filed suit against God accusing God of causing “fearsome floods, egregious earthquakes, horrendous hurricanes, terrifying tornadoes, pestilential plagues, ferocious famines, devastating droughts, genocidal wars, birth defects, and the like.” Chambers claimed his action was a response to another lawsuit that was filed in the state court, where a woman was taking Lancaster County Judge, Jeffrey Cheuvront to federal court for ruling the words “rape”, “sexual assault kit”, “victim”, and “assailant” could not be used in her testimony. Senator Chambers deemed this frivolous and inappropriate and stated “For the life of me, I do not understand why a judge would tell an alleged rape victim that she cannot say she was ‘raped’ when she testifies in a trial about rape…” As he claimed “The Constitution requires that the courthouse doors be open, so you cannot prohibit the filing of suits. Anyone can sue anyone they choose, even God.”

Source: Wired

6. Mr. T filed a lawsuit against Best Buy Inc. for using his image without authorization, claiming the Best Buy’s November, 2002 ad made him “look like a fool”. The ad featured a digitally altered scene from “Rocky III”, where Mr. T is boxing with an out-of- shape Best Buy sales clerk. T claimed that the ad could hurt his business reputation and “the quality of his professional persona”. At the time, he was promoting a long-distance telephone service featuring the puppet ALF and former pro-wrestler Hulk Hogan.

Source: Reuters

7. Plaintiff Jonathan Lee Riches, whom has sued nearly everyone on the planet, dead or alive, filed a lawsuit against Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Maddox Jolie Pitt, Zahara Jolie Pitt, Shiloh Jolie Pitt, and Pax Jolie Pitt, claiming “the defendants Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie kidnapped Madeleine McCann in a major conspiracy plot to adopt her against her will, as part of a secret plot to take, kidnap and adopt a child from each of the 192 world wide countries.” He was of course given this secret information by his trusted pen pal, Billy Bob Thorton.

8. Yet another ludicrous claim by Jonathan Lee Riches occurred when he sued Defendant Sean “P-ditty”, “Puffy” “Puff Daddy” John Combs, alleging that Combs assaulted him at the Gotham Night Club after Lee Riches had stolen his credit cards.

Source: Justia News

9. In the 1900’s, a politician’s daughter was killed by an elephant during a circus parade. The elephant was then tried, convicted and hung for murder.

10. And to conclude these series of cases a lawyer would cringe to defend- in South Bend, Indiana, a monkey was tried and convicted for smoking a cigarette.

Source: Gravel to Gravel

Cats

The Bengal Cat - $800-$3,000

Bengal Cat is a hybrid breed designed to have the look and feel of a wild cat but have the docile nature of a domestic cat. Depending on the generation, you may have a cat that’s slightly wilder and as a result can be difficult to raise.

White Lion Cubs - $140,000

White Lions do exist in the wild but are extremely rare. Their whiteness is as a result of a recessive gene. Breeders have attempted to breed them in captivity but the results are often not good as inbreeding causes the White Lions to be born with debilitating health issues such as lung and respertory problems and mental retardation.

Monkeys

Squirrel Monkey - $4,000

Squirrel Monkey originates from the tropical forests of Central and South America. So why not pluck them out of their natural habitat and put them on your velvet ottoman? The Squirrel Monkey is quite small, rarely growing larger than 2lbs. They make for very intelligent and affable pets.

Chimpanzee - $60,000-$65,000

Chimpanzees are one of the first primates to be kept as pets. Common in African villages, this idea of having Chimps as pets spread out to Europe and America. Chimps are some of the smartest pets you could own and with proper training can do a lot of you household tasks. (i.e. cleaning, accounting, walking the dog.)

Dogs

Chinese Crested Hairless Puppies - $4,000

The Chinese Crested Hairless Puppies are known for their playful and energetic demeanor which makes them particularly appealing as family pets. Perhaps the only downside to owning this particular breed is the fact that they’re quite amazingly ugly. One member of this breed was crowned the world’s ugliest dog for 3 years straight.

English Bulldog - $2,000-$5,000

The only reason these dogs exist is because of humans. Without human intervention these dogs would be totally unable to reproduce effectively. This is the main reason the English bulldog is so expensive. The cost of breeding is so high due to the fact that physically, male bulldogs are unable to have sex with female bulldogs and subsequently human intervention is needed in the form of artificial insemination. Female bulldogs nearly always require a caesarian section when they give birth because the puppies’ heads are simply to large for the birth canal. It’s almost always necessary to deliver bulldog pups via caesarian section, due to the large size of the puppies’ heads.

Birds

Hyacinth Macaw - $6,500-$12,000

It’s a bird.

Snakes

Reticulated Albino Type II Tiger Python - $15,000

Famed for their longness or ‘longosity’, Reticulated Pythons are some of the longest snakes in the world. One of its most distinguishing features is the tiger like pattern along its back.

Lavender Albino Ball Python - $20,000

Discovered in 2003, this African snake sports a lavender colour and bright ruby red eyes. This makes for a great conversation piece when you bring women over.

Most people are content with a regularly sized pizza from the local pizza place. But there are others, rich in money and time, who are hellbent on making the acquisition and consumption of pizza mind numbingly and needlessly complicated. And here they are:

Largest Pizza Ever Made

On December 8th, 1990, a monumentally wasteful record was set by Pick ‘n’ Pay hypermarket in Johannesburg, South Africa when a pizza measuring 37.4 meters in diameter was, for lack of a better term, constructed. It’s said to have been made using 500 kg of flour, 800 kg of cheese and 900 kg of tomato paste.

Longest Pizza Delivery

Lucy Clough of Domino’s holds the record for longest pizza delivery in history. She took a Dominos vegetarian supreme pizza the distance of 16,950km from Feltham, London to 30 Ramsay Street, Melbourne, Australia, on November 19, 2004. It took 2 days to arrive… which means it was outside the 30 minute window. Yay Free pizza!

Honorary Mention
Bernard Jordaan of Butler’s Pizza had the previous record. He once delivered a pizza from Cape Town, South Africa to Sydney, Australia (What is with these crazy Aussies? Don’t they have pizza in Australia?) The trip totaled 11,042 km (6,861 miles). This had remained the record until Lucy Clough ruined everything.

Most Expensive Pizza

So we’ve covered the Largest Pizza and the Longest Delivery…how about the Most Expensive? Domenico Crolla created the most expensive pizza which had edible gold, medallions of venison, sunblush-tomato sauce, Scottish smoked salmon, lobster marinated in fine cognac and champagne-soaked caviar. The pizza was sold at auction for charity. It dawned a hefty price tag of $3000.00. Well, if it’s for charity…

Most “Extravagant” Pizza

If you’re looking for an ‘Extravagant’ pizza then stop by Nino’s Bellissima restaurant in New York. For the modest price of $1000.00 (or $125 a slice) you could get your hands on a 12 inch ‘Luxury Pizza’ with six different kinds of caviar, fresh lobster, chives and crème fraîche, In these tough economic times, opting for a slice might be the more sensible thing to do.

Woman Who Eats Nothing But Pizza

While this woman is clearly insane, it’s still interesting to know just how long one can live consuming nothing but pizza.

Keukenhof (Netherlands)

Keukenhof, which literally translates to kitchen court garden, has been around since 1949 and is the world’s largest and most impressive flower parks. It is a taste of heaven for any tulip lover- with it’s 7 million Dutch bulbs that are planted annually; a real sight for soar eyes. The Keukenhof is great for families; with childrens playgrounds and spots for picnicking. Also of interest for this upcoming summer, the Keukenhof will be commemorating 400 years of the historic relationship between the United States and the Netherlands. A flower mosaic of the Statue of Liberty will be made of 25, 000 flower bulbs- an event not to be missed.

Epcot International Flower & Garden Festival (Florida)

An enjoyable experience for any and all- The Epcot International Flower and Garden Festival adorns your favorite Disney characters in roses, tulips, daffodils and millions of blooming flowers with a collection of specially themed topiaries, making for one of the most visually astounding and charming sights to been seen.

International Festival of Gardens at Chaumont-sur-Loire (France)

A unique experience for any traveler- these 26 breathtaking gardens designed by artists, landscape artists and botanists, chosen from all around the world, swathe the Chaumont chateau, with some of the most original and mind-blowing creations one could ever lay eyes on.

Balboa Park Flower Garden (San Diego)

Balboa Park was home to two of San Diego’s World Fairs (1915-1916, 1935). A legacy that continues on since those World Fairs, Balboa Park pays tribute to gardens from around the globe. With over a dozen gardens spread out over 1,200 acres, they envelop a multitude of museums and performing arts centers.

Mah-Fah-Luang Gardens (Thailand)

Located in front of Doi Tung Palace, you can find some of the most unique winter flowers and decorative plants to carry you away in your imagination.

Melbourne International Flower and Garden Show (Australia)

Entering its 14th year, the Melbourne International Flower and Garden Show has come to be regarded as the largest and most successful horticultural event in the Southern Hemisphere. Ranked in the top 5 flower shows in the world, this spectacular flower show represents the heart and soul of Australia, with some of the most impressive landscapes created by Australia’s finest talent.

Luang Peony Festival (China)

One of the most remarkable sights for the much adored peony, no Chinese city has been able to rival Luoyang in growing peonies, so much that it has become a local obsession. Boasting 500, 000 peony shrubs, ‘the peony of Luoyang’ as the saying goes ‘is the most beautiful flower under heaven’ and visitors to the festival can even enjoy a number of variety shows and exhibitions of Chinese calligraphy and painting.

Seattle North West Flower & Garden Show (Washington)

As the largest gardening show on the West Coast, Seattle’s North West Flower and Garden Show attracted over 85, 000 visitors just last year. From the intimate to the lavish this show opens the door to a mecca of flora and garden possibilities.

Singapore Garden Festival (Singapore)

With an astounding 300,000 visitors yearly for this eight-day event, the festival features 18 show gardens and 14 flora displays by 35 designers in 17 countries. What sets this magnificent festival apart from any other is that it is the only event in the world where people have the chance to see and experience the garden and floral creations of the world’s top award-winning designers under one roof.

Van Dusen Flower & Garden Show (Vancouver)

One the largest shows of its kind in all of North America, the Van Dunsen Flower & Garden Show has imaginative gardens with themes such as Eden, a Victorian Conservatory Fern Grotto and a Medieval Monastery Herbarium. And if you get a little thirsty down the road you can even quench it with some wine and beer, available throughout the gardens.

Just 80 kilometers from the eastern edge of the magnificent Canadian Rockies, lays one of Canada’s most beautiful and prosperous cities. Ranked the world’s cleanest city by Forbes magazine in 2007, Calgary is a dynamic place with much to boast about. Home of the first Canadian winter Olympics in 1988, Calgary is full of new development and liveliness. As Canada’s second largest municipality, Calgary is home to 876,519 people and is the fifth largest metropolitan area in the country. A distinctive culture priding itself on the traditions of the old west, visitors to the city can expect a friendly smile and a tip of the cowboy hat to go along with it.

Calgary is certainly ideal for anyone who loves the outdoors.The city has one of the most extensive multi-use pathways in North America. These pathways connect neighborhoods and urban parks together. Come summer, come winter, whether you love skiing, hiking, golf there is always an activity that awaits.

From Oil Boom to Calga-crunch, Back to Boom

Though oil was first discovered in Alberta in 1902, it wasn’t until 1947 that it became a significant industry. Calgary experienced an oil boom in the 1970’s, as a result of the Arab oil embargo. The city went from low-buildings to skyscrapers that were being constructed at a rate faster than almost any other city had ever seen. Calgary’s business opportunities were at a high, particularly in the petroleum industry, though agriculture and tourism also contributed to the city’s economic growth.

In the 1980’s, Calgary’s economy underwent a great decline with the implementation of the National Energy Program. Westerners were particularly resentful towards the Canadian government, perceiving this decision as an intrusion to their provincial affairs. Some people were so unhappy it even elicited a “western separatist party” movement. By the mid-80’s, the NEP was canceled, however the province wouldn’t fully recover until the 1990’s.

Recently, Calgary has been no stranger to the recession. Homelessness is a major issue; violence between gangs and the drug trade have become dominant sources of crime. Though Calgary still remains one of the safest city’s in Canada, it is experiencing its share of problems. The cost of living had skyrocketed a few years back. Now, according to the Canadian Real Estate Association “Calgary posted the second-highest year-over-year percentage decline in residential multiple listing service (MLS) sales in the country in 2008 and led the country with the biggest annual drop in the average sale price.”

Despite the obstacles the city is faced with, Alberta Premier Ed Stelmach has implemented a ten year program to fight poverty. Community organizations such as Vibrant Communities Calgary have also come together as a response to poverty and its effects.

Calgary continues to stand out as one of the country’s most important business regions. In fact, with Calgary’s huge reserves of oil, CIBC World Markets predicts that Alberta will become the most important source of new oil in the world by 2010.

The Calgary Stampede

If there is one thing that puts Calgary on the map, it’s the Calgary Stampede. 10 days of world-renowned rodeo competitions, chuckwagon races, music, dancing and pancake breakfasts. Stampede is one of Canada’s largest events- billing itself as “The Greatest Outdoor Show on Earth”. A volunteer-supported organization, the Calgary Stampede promotes western values and heritage and all the proceeds get reinvested for the next year’s event.

Plus 15

Another unique thing about Calgary is its Plus 15 system, which connects downtown skyscrapers by a series of above-ground walkways. Even in the coldest of winter days, people can promenade the downtown area without a jacket on.

Calgary At The Movies

With its incredible mountain scenery and staggering skyscrapers, it’s no wonder Calgary is one of the top destinations for movie filming. Calgary has been featured in some big Hollywood blockbusters such as “Legends of the Fall”, “Unforgiven”, “Shanghai Noon”, “The Assassination of Jesse James” and “Brokeback Mountain”, to name a few.